It’s a hard one, isn’t it?
The words get in the way more than we care to admit. We can use them to shame, to bludgeon others – even with the truth – and the law of kindness is not in our mouths. But more than anything else, the volume of words is unnecessary.
Often we preclude a sentence with, “I know I shouldn’t say this, BUT…” That’s exactly when we should shut up. When will we learn?
All my life I’ve talked too much. I still have my report cards from elementary school and almost every six weeks there’s a comment like this:
- “Cathleen talks to much.”
- “Cathleen, let’s practice more self-control next six weeks.”
- “Cathleen needs to be a little less social.”
- “Cathleen is a babbling brook.”
When I was seventeen and dating Bob Poulsen, his mother bought me a gift. I was excited to see what it was. She’d only known me a short time. I tore open the package to find a Chatty Cathy doll, fully equipped with a pull string in the back of her neck so you could make her talk. I was a bit miffed with the present because I got the message. I talked too much!
While most of us have been taught not to say “Shut up!”, at times it’s the best message we can send ourselves. It’s an instruction reiterated several places in God’s Word.
Fools base their thoughts on foolish assumptions…they chatter on and on… ~ Ecclesiastes 10:13,14.
“…too many words make you a fool.” ~ Ecclesiastes 5:3
Talk is cheap, like daydreams and other useless activities. Fear God instead. ~ Ecclesiastes 5:7
My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, – James 1:19 NIV
Most of us have more to say than others care to hear.
A few years ago this truth crashed into my life unexpectedly. We had gone to dinner with good friends and then back to their home for coffee and dessert. Around the table, we talked of many things and then one of the men – a man who hears from God in a more direct way than most – began to speak to me.
“Cathee, you are a woman with unquestioned wisdom gained in the presence of God. But because you often talk a lot, the power of your words is diluted; it’s lost in the much talking. I believe the Lord wants you to know this is a new season for you. One in which you need to speak less and not until he releases you to say something.”
As I listened I knew he was speaking an important word to me. One I could choose to obey or dismiss. In an instant, all those other links – talking too much in class, Chatty Cathy – they all formed a solid chain that revealed something needed correction.
Since that conversation, I’ve paid more attention to myself in this area. If you asked my family, they’d say I still need more work here, but I also think they’d say there’s a difference.
The older I get, the more I realize, I have less to say. I don’t want to express an opinion on every little thing. I listen to people making value judgments about everything on earth. They spout off such foolishness and I see how silly I’ve sounded half my life.
When Mercy Me came out with Word of God Speak and I heard the words, really heard them for the first time, I knew them to be the key to shutting up when I need to shut up.
“The last thing I need is to be heard, but to hear what You would say.”
Don’t you agree?
“Finding myself, at a loss for words – and the funny thing is…it’s okay.”
Me too!! Here is a prayer I have posted on my bathroom mirror… Lord, keep me from the habit of thinking I must say something on every subject and on every occasion. Release me from craving to straighten out everyone’s affairs. Keep my mind free from the recital of endless details and give me wings to get to the point. I ask for grace enough to listen to the tales of others pains. Help me to endure them with patience. But seal my lips on my own aches and pains. They are increasing and my love of rehearsing them is becoming sweeter as the years go by. Teach me the glorious lesson that occasionally it is possible that I may be mistaken. Keep me reasonably sweet. I do not want to be a saint – some of them are so hard to live with, but a sour old person is one of the crowning works of the devil. Give me the ability to see good things in unexpected places and talents in unexpected people. And give me, O Lord, the grace to tell them so. Make me thoughtful, but not moody; helpful, but not bossy. With my vast store of wisdom, it seems a pity not to use it all, but Thou knowest, Lord, that I want a few friends at the end. Amen I can’t pray it often enough. Love you dear friend!!
That’s a great prayer, Cynde. Love it! And you!
THIS JUST CONFIRM WHAT THE HOLY HAS SAID TO ME
I BELIEVE THE HOLY SPIRIT JUST SPOKE TO ME AND SAID…………….TALK MORE TO JESUS AND LESS TO MAN! I BELIEVE THAT MIGHT PREACH!!!!!
Well said, as always.
Oh how this spoke to me today. I have been praying that I keep my mouth shut as I continue interviews for a new job. I may not speak too much but I almost always speak at the wrong time. Thanks for the words of wisdom. I continue to pray that I listen more and “stifle” my opinion.
Hmmmmm, a little Archie Bunker syndrome here perhaps.
Hope I don’t offend anyone with this, but people like me love hearing people like you sharing your thoughts. Bring it on without restraint as God leads. I have never…no not one time…thought you talk too much.
And you are the kindest person I’ve ever known!!
You always have very good wisdom to share with me. I’m glade to be a good listener.
What would Chatty Cathee ever do without you?
And you are the best!
Good one, Cathee. It really made me think about the words coming out of my mouth. I want all my words to be edifying and beneficial, but at times, it is very hard not to comment on something that you feel truly passionate about.
By the way, I had a Chatty Cathee too. She was one of my favorite dolls. Wish I still had her.
God Speed,
Sue
Thanks, Cathee. I’ll add my Amen. It’s often hard to bridle the tongue, but have found it to be very satisfying when I actally practice it. And, we’re admonished to be “slow to speak”, not to always be quiet. You’re right, the pause in using our words allows the Holy Spirit to get involved in the process…and that can lead to speaking words of wisdom, rather than our own finite logic. One other thing, NEVER suppress your laugh. It brings a smile to my face each time I remember it!
You made my day with that last comment, Doc. 🙂